UPBUILDING THE SELF

The Ego vs. The Self

At Upbuild, we talk a lot about the difference between the ego and the self. But it can often feel like everything – our goals, motivations, achievements, aspirations, emotions, etc. – is part of the ego. So, what then is left? Vipin, Hari Prasada, and Rasanath disentangle the subtleties of the self and explain why the ego is the lens through which we experience our whole world. They unpack the connection between the ego and the truth, how we can use the ego to get rid of the ego, the paradox of progress, and what happens if we don’t “wake up” from the state of living as the ego.

Podcast Hosts: Vipin, Hari Prasada and Rasanath Das

Highlights

  • [2:35] Why does it feel like everything we talk about is part of the ego?

  • [5:20] The difference between who I think I should be and who I really am

  • [7:20] The dream metaphor

  • [11:30] The gap between the self and the ego

  • [13:50] The primary story to defend

  • [16:50] The ego vs. the self as a spectrum

  • [17:20] Is “I am kind” an identity of the ego or the self?

  • [21:30] The source of inner and outer conflict

  • [22:40] How the ego distorts our perception

  • [24:00] The paradox of progress

  • [28:20] The true source of motivation

  • [32:50] Being a student of the self

  • [36:00] The stakes of not understanding the difference between the ego and the self

Quotes

  • “If we were to think about how wide the ego’s domain is, it’s as wide as is our life." -Vipin

  • “The kindness of the real self doesn’t need that self-obsession. It’s really about the other person.” -Hari Prasada

  • “The ego can only manufacture from what is true.” -Rasanath Das

  • “The self is providing the content of what is valuable, and that is being transmitted through the ego…and it comes out as something completely different, and that’s where all inner and outer conflict comes from.” -Hari Prasada

  • “Until the ego is removed, the self suffers alone, forever.” -Hari Prasada

  • “There’s this void in the heart…and we try to fill that by controlling and enjoying…but what we do in the process is we lose ourselves.” -Hari Prasada

  • “When we live our lives short of what is actually possible, when we settle, there’s a certain tragic nature to it…it’s a life not fully lived.” -Rasanath Das

For first timers, welcome to Upbuilding the Self

About the podcast: Two former monks, a former startup founder and CEO, and a former equity derivatives trader dive into how to be our best selves, free from the ego. Our egos are the identities we create for ourselves and wish the world to validate, but when we are not seen as we want to be, we feel insecure. This podcast lives at the intersection of leadership and spirituality. It will help you understand your ego and shed light on your inner world so that you can act with greater clarity, compassion, and the freedom to be your best self.