UPBUILDING THE SELF

How to Take a Compliment

Compliments are the currency of love and something we all crave. Yet, paradoxically, somehow receiving a compliment is so hard for most of us. In this episode, Vipin and Hari dive into the dynamics of compliments and our ego's complex response to them. They explore how our longing for validation often leads us to reject the very recognition we seek. Through personal anecdotes and philosophical insights, they unpack the hidden impact on our self-perception and relationships as we struggle with compliments. They also share practical tips for how to receive as well as give effective compliments.

Podcast Hosts: Vipin and Hari Prasada

Listen to this episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or your preferred podcast platform

Highlights

  • [02:00] Why compliments matter and their deep connection to validation

  • [03:50] The metaphor of the “bottomless bag of medals”

  • [05:40] Why receiving compliments confronts our ego

  • [08:00] Common responses to compliments: deflection, downplaying, and outright rejection

  • [09:30]  Deflated vs. inflated ego reactions to praise

  • [13:00] The impact of rejecting a compliment on the giver

  • [25:00] Practical strategies for taking compliments effectively

  • [33:30] Michael Sloyer’s reflection: Love In the Workplace

  • [34:20] Practical strategies for giving compliments

  • [38:40] The fear of not being humble

  • [43:10] Closing thoughts and a call to action

Quotes

  • “Validation is what every single person is starving for more than anything else. And love is…where that comes from. In the purest sense, we want to love and be loved.” - Hari Prasada

  • “The superiority complex is an inferiority complex, just manifesting outwardly very differently.” - Hari Prasada

  • “What is a compliment? It's validation. What is validation? Validation is love.” - Vipin

  • “Rejecting a compliment is rejecting reality. It keeps us further from the truth of who we are.” - Hari Prasada

  • “Relationships are giving power to other people…we're giving them a say in our life…The more intimate the relationship, the more power we're giving to the other. Let's do that wisely and consciously and not do it out of fear.” - Hari Prasada

  • “When the compliment comes, it affects the heart.” - Hari Prasada

For first timers, welcome to Upbuilding the Self

About the podcast: Two former monks, a former startup founder and CEO, and a former equity derivatives trader dive into how to be our best selves, free from the ego. Our egos are the identities we create for ourselves and wish the world to validate, but when we are not seen as we want to be, we feel insecure. This podcast lives at the intersection of leadership and spirituality. It will help you understand your ego and shed light on your inner world so that you can act with greater clarity, compassion, and the freedom to be your best self.

We also have three upcoming programs. Please reserve your spot ASAP.