UPBUILDING THE SELF

Gossip: The Temptation and Tolls

Why do we gossip and what is the impact of gossip on us and the people around us?

In this episode, Vipin, Michael, and Hari Prasada examine why the topic of gossip is applicable to all of us, what we “achieve” when we engage in gossip, and the subtle and not-so-subtle costs that we pay when we do it. They give us actionable next steps to help us understand what is going on inside us when we gossip and how to choose a way of communicating that will create healthier relationships.

Podcast Hosts: Hari Prasada, Michael and Vipin

  • Highlights

  • [2:50] Michael’s inspiration for the topic and the culture of gossip on Long Island

  • [5:10] What is gossip?

  • [7:00] ​​Kierkegaard’s understanding of “leveling”

  • [9:20] Why is it important to talk about gossip?

  • [10:00] Emerson’s quote on how sowing a thought reaps a destiny

  • [11:15] The dangers of enabling a gossip culture

  • [14:30] Why do people gossip?

  • [18:00] Vipin’s personal example of working for a failing company

  • [22:25] Michael’s personal example of his group Whatsapp chat

  • [25:45] Satisfying our desire for entertainment from a place of insecurity

  • [28:00] Are we taking this too seriously?

  • [32:40] How to stop engaging in gossip

  • [41:50] The nectar bee and the fly

Quotes

  • “When we are gossiping we are violating our own values[...] and we become the kind of person that is okay with violating our own values.” - Michael

  • “If we are trying to become our best self [...] we have to invest in raising our consciousness. Gossip brings down our consciousness.” -Hari Prasada

  • “In gossiping we are sowing a lot of thoughts in our consciousness and that affects our destination.” -Vipin

  • “Gossip comes from that insecurity of wanting to feel enough and not recognizing it because it’s humiliating” -Hari Prasada

  • “By engaging in gossip we are investing more and more in identifying with our ego instead of the self.” -Vipin

For first timers, welcome to Upbuilding the Self

About the podcast: Two former monks, a former startup founder and CEO, and a former equity derivatives trader dive into how to be our best selves, free from the ego. Our egos are the identities we create for ourselves and wish the world to validate, but when we are not seen as we want to be, we feel insecure. This podcast lives at the intersection of leadership and spirituality. It will help you understand your ego and shed light on your inner world so that you can act with greater clarity, compassion, and the freedom to be your best self.